Saturday 31 December 2011

Get Out Of My Church, Before I Smash Your Face...

The exact place where the Jesus was born, once a very small Premier Inn, is now The Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem. Quite possibly one of the holiest sites in the world, including other locations such as Mecca, the River Ganges and my place on the sofa.

Not necessarily the place you expect it to kick off, certainly not between men of the cloth. Check this out:



Firstly, this is ultra funny. Arms house in the house of God. This ain't Celtic vs Rangers, Millwall vs West Ham or Boca Juniors vs River Plate. Nope, this is Greek Orthodox and Armenian clerics who have had a dispute over boundaries, apparently hammered out of their minds on holy wine, kicking off before making their preparations for CHRISTMAS. The only reason this epic 100 priest strong "Battle of the Basilica" came to an end was that they got raided by Old Bill. Bless me Father for I have sinned, I smashed a broom handle over another priest's kneecaps. Brilliant.

Of note, at the start is one Father, probably youth firm with his hood up, whipping out his smartphone to catch the action: "This shit's going on YouTube!" before the plod come in (0:18) and give one hell of a (sorry, heavenly) beat down to another of the church leading combatants who's hiding sheepishly in the corner after dashing a broom in another cleric's face. "I'm just here to watch the mass!" he pleads.

Then, at (0:26), this fella walks across wearing something that looks very much like a criss-cross Stone Island jumper. How much more firm do you want to get? Not wearing any colours, behind the Old Bill lines trying to get everyone involved!

Finally, at (0:43), you can clearly see one of the Armenians' uber-bearded top (alter) boys "not avvin none of it" with the coppers, probably already on a ban after it kicked off down in Nazareth at Easter.

There were no arrests as Bethlehem police chiefs said they were "men of God". The local atheist councillor, however, commented "pure thuggery, they were blatantly all here for a row, we should have used rubber bullets".

Sources suggest the next mass may take place behind closed doors.

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